Car Trouble
Pattyanne 's Fic
Kings of Mercia
LoobyLoos' Fic
Jen's Fic

Car Trouble……



By the Kings of Mercia


When Spike finds Buffy broken down on the open road, miles from anywhere – he see’s it as a golden opportunity to get exactly what he wants. Will the slayer comply? – NC 17 – eventually!


Chapter 1



The evening was balmy, and the sun began to sink low, Buffy drove along happily in her open-top convertible, the dry dusty highway stretched for miles in front of her, the wind blowing her hair – she was singing along to a tape.


This was the type of driving Buffy liked. Nothing behind her, nothing in front of her except miles of straight road – no stop signs, or things to suddenly jump out at her from side-streets, no corners to negotiate and best of all, no reverse parking…….okay – she’d be the first to admit it, she wasn’t the worlds worst driver, it’s just that, well……. she wasn’t the best either – not by a long chalk…….things just seemed to happen to her, with unfailing regularity. 


Seemed that fire hydrants had a nasty habit of suddenly being in the way when she parked…. And her sense of distance used to be a little ‘off’ when she drove onto the drive at home – so much so, that instead of demolishing the wall a brick at a time with the front bumper, she’d decided to remove it altogether manually, basically to save the sarcastic comments from her friends, and a small fortune in bricks and mortar for repairs….


Trees were another culprit, they also joined in the conspiracy theory of showing that her driving skills weren’t all they could be…they’d  jump out at her just at the crucial moment when she was reversing – that happened so often,  the car-part store had a supply of tail-lights just for her….if she didn’t feel the jolt, and hear a ‘clunk – tinkle-tinkle’ of broken glass when she reversed, she’d have thought she hadn’t done it right!


But today, none of that to spoil things! Just hold the steering wheel, foot down and she could even sing at the top of her lungs and there was nobody to complain!


Feeling like a change of mood, Buffy ejected the love song tape, and inserted a compilation of her favourite tracks.

She drove along, head nodding, her fingers tapping along with the beat against the steering wheel.


“…………Sisters, are doin’ it for themselves, standin’ on their own two feet – whu-what?”


Suddenly, for want of a better description, the car ‘kangaroo hopped’ for a few yards, the engine made a laboured whining and clunking sound, and despite her foot being on the accelerator, the car was having none of it, and it slowed to a stop, steam began to belch out from under the hood.


Buffy switched off the ignition, and lent her forehead on the steering wheel for a few moments.


“Terrific…why me – huh – bloody, useless thing! She popped the hood, and  angrily got out of the car, and slammed the door – she had to resist the temptation to kick the thing.


“What the hell’s wrong with you!” Buffy groused as she carefully opened the hood and put the strut up to keep it open. She wafted her hand back and forward to clear the steam, and touched the radiator cap – which, to her cost she found out that she shouldn’t have touched it at all, not until it had cooled down from the raging geyser it was emulating at the time.


“OW – Bloody hell!” She waggled her scalded hand. The smell of burning rubber permeated the air and she sighed. Nothing else for it but to leave the hood open for a while for it to cool down.


An hour later, when the thing was barely warm, she tried to start it – nothing. It wasn’t that it made a noise like it was even trying to start, all she could hear, was the click of the ignition key being turned.


Scrabbling around in the glove compartment, she found the repair manual, and opened it.

It might as well have been written Swahili for all she understood of it, and she snapped it shut and threw it back where she found it, slamming the compartment closed angrily.


There was nothing else for it – she’d have to phone Xander now – oh boy the stick they’d give her for this – she’d endured enough of their sarcasm before she took this trip –


“Huh, even YOU can’t find anything to hit along THAT highway!” Xander had said


“No trees or fire-hydrants to spoil your reverse parking!” Willow added with a grin.


Buffy had given them all a tight-lipped smile, but it began to wear thin which the Scooby’s found to their cost as the following night she’d given them a real work-out when they patrolled with her. But there was nothing else for it, she’d just have to swallow her pride, and call Xander…


Reaching over for her purse on the backseat, she opened it, and took out her cell phone.


Flipping it open, she switched on, but the little screen didn’t light up…she looked at it, and tried again – in her minds eye, she saw Dawn sitting in the kitchen, holding it, her thumbs moving dexterously over the keypad, the little madam hadn’t re-charged it after her marathon texting session!


“I’m gonna KILL you Dawn! – How the hell am I going to get home now – oh god – why me, WHY ME GOD?!” Buffy shouted to th sky. It had started to get dark very quickly now, and cooler. All she was wearing were her ‘Daisy Dukes’ short shorts, and a short crop top – hardly suitable attire to spend the night in almost desert conditions…


She realised she HAD to be practical, the best idea would be to close the soft-top roof over, but she had absolutely no idea how  - or even if she could do it manually.


“Please gods, the Powers That Be, Allah, Jehovah, Buddha – Krishna – anybody – PLEASE make somebody drive by……soon” Buffy frowned and bit her lip, tutted and sat in the drivers seat, but with her feet out. A movement caught her eye at the edge of the road, and in the twilight, she saw a lizard quickly scooting along, rapidly followed by a snake.


“Ew…crawly things…um………….there” Buffy quickly decided she didn’t want to share her car with any creature of the creepy crawly type, and she swiftly turned and sat properly in the car and shut the door. Demons and monsters she could handle, spiders, lizards, snakes –uh-uh – no way Pedro!


Having no power in the car, she assumed that the battery must be flat – well boy, when she got home – SOMEBODY was for a rocketing, the car wasn’t six months old yet – there was NO WAY that the battery could be flat – oh - hello… Buffy looked in the driving mirror, and thought she saw the glimmer of light.


She turned and looked, and sure enough, although it was a long way off, there was definitely a car coming towards her!


“Saved – I’m saved – thank the gods – whichever one of you it was!” Quickly checking in the mirror that she at least looked presentable, she got out of the car, and stood by the open hood, waiting to if need be, flag down the passing motorist.


She tried to pull down the tight little shorts down, but there was really no way she was EVER going to make them look decent, and she just hoped, well, that the whoever it was going to come to her aid was a gentleman, coz if he wasn’t well, he’d find out to his cost, just how strong she was………….

She could make out the headlights properly now, he was probably about half a mile away…and getting closer, and closer…….until she cold hear it coming…or rather hear the occupant, singing for want of a better word loudly……….



“……I am the anti-Christ, I am an anarchist- a- I know what I want, and I know how to get it – ooh…what have we here then – hello, hello, damsel in distress….there IS a god….Hehehe….” Spike grinned to himself. Taking another swig out of his bottle of Jack Daniels, he slowed the car and pulled up behind the obviously broken down one.


“Thank god, can you – YOU!”


“Oh well lookie here! Isn’t this just peachy! (Grinning, Spike got fully out of his car and slammed the door shut) What you done to it this time blondie, kicked it as you couldn’t find any trees to hit?” Spike stood by his car, reached in and drained the third of Jack he had left. He sauntered over to her, holding onto his belt, a satisfied grin on his face.


“What the HELL are you do – scrub that, I DON’T want to know – you needn’t wait – go – I’ve um, I’m waiting for the breakdown recovery! – Hey I SAID –

leave that – don’t you DARE TOUCH – are you listening to…” Buffy blinked as she realised that not only was Spike NOT listening to her, he was taking VERY great interest in her attire – or rather lack of it, and suddenly she felt exposed.


Spike licked his lips, leaving his tongue in the corner of his mouth and grinned.


She felt his stare travel up her legs and continue all the way to her face, lingering on the way. There was a gust of cool wind, and Buffy shuddered, her nipples going hard with cold.


“Looking a tad...under-dressed, even for you, slayer – must admit though…I’m not complaining!”


Buffy jumped into the car and huddled over, but she called out –


“Go AWAY Spike – I mean it – I don’t need or WANT your help!”


Spike came and stood by the door.


“Fine by me love, what time did you call the recovery?”


“Just before you stopped” Buffy lied


“Oh, well that means they won’t be here for what…good couple of hours yet”


“What – don’t be ridiculous! – They said under an hour!” she bit her bottom lip.


“And I don’t believe you, because…suit yourself – anyway it’s bound to be something really simple!” He sauntered to the front of the car again, standing where he had been looking down her top had given him a hard-on – not that that was unusual when he was around her, but she was a little fraught at the moment – she needed to calm a little…


“You DO know these things need gas, don’t you?” Spike’s disembodied voice said.


Buffy’s fist’s clenched, and through gritted teeth she hissed,


“Yes, I HAVEN’T run out of gas!”


“Just askin’ is all…I know what you females are like…pull out the cold-weather starter and you hang your purse on it….” Suddenly, Spike spied what the problem was, one of the leads had come adrift from the battery – all it needed was pressing on – not for one second he was going to tell Buffy that….


“You still here? – I thought I told you to go!”


Spike strolled back to her, he decided to have some fun – needle the slayer – she couldn’t possibly be hiding a stake anywhere in that outfit, and he’d have plenty of time to react if she had one stashed in the car somewhere – which he doubted – no, NOW was definitely time to play Baffle Buffy with Bullshit time!


Buffy shivered again, it was getting chillier by the minute.


“Now, don’t be like that…tell me, slayer, before you took on this marathon trip through the Arizona desert, did you put on the sprocket filters, huh? Did you double grease the flange nodules and slightly loosen the grub nuts so the flywheels can run independently of the camshaft? – You have to do that, else you’ll find that if you drive at over fifty miles an hour, the sand whips in through the filters and quickly silts up the feeder tract. Did you blow-through the carburettor heads and test for tracking balance?”


All Spike had done, was string a few totally made up, but plausible sounding engine parts, with a few real ones, to make it sound like he knew what he was talking about. He could picture her, bowling along at 70 MPH+, wind in her hair, bet she looked like a sodding shampoo commercial!


Buffy looked at Spike and blinked


“Piss off!”


“I’ll take that as a no then, shall I?” He grinned and toed the ground.


“Don’t tell me YOU know ANYTHING about cars – that heap of JUNK you drive!” Buffy retorted hotly.


Spike gave her a smirk and bent over and leaned in towards her and said,


“Yeah, but at least my heap o’ junk actually WORKS”


“Ew, you reek of booze – you’re  a pig, Spike!” Buffy pulled a disgusted face and turned away


Spike could see the goosebumps on her arms, and he ran his finger down from her shoulder to her elbow. Buffy shivered even more, she clenched her fist ready to pop him one.


“Oink, oink! Cold pet?”


“A gentleman would have offered me his coat! AND DON’T TOUCH ME AGAIN!”


“I thought you said I was a pig, not a gentleman, make your mind up! Anyway, or else you’ll what? – This recovery service are taking their time…when did you say you called them?” Spike spied the cell phone sticking out of her bag, and plucked it out.



“Give me that back!” Buffy tried to grab it, but Spike held it up in the air and moved off slightly so she couldn’t reach him unless she got out of the car.



“Ingenious little things these, aren’t they…saved people lost up mountains, lost at sea, and………….(he tried switching it on, several times in fact, and realised it was like him, dead!)……. lost in the desert………….course, they have to be charged up to be any good – now, d’you know what I think, slayer?”


“Not interested!”


“I think, you’ve been telling old Spikey porky pies!”




“Lies, fibs, untruths……there is no recovery service coming to get you slayer, coz you haven’t been able to contact them!” Spike grinned, and tossed the phone back into the car.


Inside her head, Buffy was mentally cursing every god, deity and eminence at her misfortune – of all the people – beings in the world to be passing her in her moment of need, it had to be Spike –the bane of her life – the bleached moron that drove her nuts.


“Lost for words, slayer…that’s unusual, oh, I’ve got a few for you, how about,


‘Please Spike, mend my car for me, I’ll be EVER so grateful”


“How about, piss off before I stake you? – I like that MUCH better”


“Okay then……just remember, it might be DAYS before anybody else passes through here – and it’s a bloody long walk – 223 miles to be exact – have fun!”  Spike went to move off towards his car. He still had a raging hard-on, even verbally sparring with her turned him on……


“Spike, wait…” She bit her lip. The worst thing was, he could be right – it MIGHT be days before anything passed through here…


“Okay – I’ll let you look at my car to see if you can see what’s wrong with it – I promise not to stake you”


Spike grinned and continued back to his own car. He didn’t even bother to turn around he just raised a hand in a wave, and said,


“Not even close, Blondie, Adios!” he’d wear her down, he was sure as anything, coz he wanted her, wanted nothing more than to be buried in her hot, tight little body, and this was such a golden opportunity to get exactly what he wanted…………..

Chapter 2



Spike got into his car, and started it up. Buffy quickly got out of hers, and stood, feet apart in the road, effectively blocking his way, unless he pulled round onto the sand, which wasn’t a good idea, you could easily get stuck that way…….



Spike stuck his head out of the window.


“Having second thoughts, slayer?” Buffy toyed with the idea that she could easily open the door, yank Spike out and drive home in his car…but then,


1.    Did she really want to drive home in that thing…she could just imagine the inside of it, littered with liquor bottles and beer-cans, cigarette cartons and all manner of stuff she didn’t wish to even think about.


    2. There was a chance, JUST a chance, that Spike was telling the truth if he  

could fix her car when she’d driven off in his, she’d never see the little beauty again if he fixed it.


    3. Did she want to take the risk of waiting for another vehicle to pass……she was hungry – and getting thirsty – she’d last had a drink about 4 O’ clock…


Knowing she’d probably regret this for the rest of her natural, she said resignedly,


“What do you want, Spike?” Spike grinned, reversed back to where he’d parked originally and switched off the engine.


“There, I knew you’d come round to my way of thinking…” Spike muttered to himself. He got out of his car, and walked up slowly to her.


“What do I want, for what, exactly, Buffy?” There were those eyes again, undressing her, his voice all deep and rumbly. It was the first time she’d heard him use her name, and she was struck by the odd thrill it gave her the way he said it……….


“Still with me?” Spike clicked his fingers in front of her face, bringing her out of her reverie.


Buffy knew, it didn’t matter how she worded it – the outcome would be the same, so she just decided to use as few words as possible


“What do you want from me to fix my car?” The wind blew, and Spike raised his hand to her face, removing a tendril that had blown across.


“Well now, there’s a question….with a myriad of answers too….but I’ll not beat about the bush – if you pardon the _expression. In a word, you”


“Me – you want – oh- OH!” Buffy went round eyed – Did he mean what she thought she – course he did this WAS Spike we are talking about.


Buffy scoffed, she stepped back and gave him a filthy look.


“You have GOT to be joking!”


Spike, who knew she’d say that, decided to give her some home truths.


“Listen, little girl, with each minute that passes, your options are becoming less and less……..we’ve been piss-balling around here now for what, an hour – hour and a half – with NO other car in sight, you’re getting tired, I can tell your core temperature is dropping too – easy to die of hypothermia out here – and I can hear your stomach rumbling – so the sooner you stop fucking me about, and give me what I want, the quicker you can get home to a nice microwave dinner and a warm comfy bed – okay?”


Buffy was totally speechless – unusual for her, yes – normally she had some witty retort, some caustic comment but for the life of her, she just couldn’t think.


Not that she’d admit it, but she HAD actually thought about having sex with Spike at one time or another, when they fought which was a rare occurrence these days, but when they did, they were totally well matched. It was as if each knew the next move to be made, and they countermanded with a move of their own. After sparring with him, she always felt exhilarated……..


She’d seen his muscles ripple – saw the sculptured pecs, the six-pack abs, the taut lean stomach – the way his biceps bulged…and talking of bulges…she turned her head, and bit her bottom lip, it had been AGES since she’d had sex.


“We could be so good together…it’ll be the best YOU ever have. I know I get you hot”


“HUH, EGO MUCH? YOU DON’T GET ME HOT!” Buffy lied. She didn’t like Spike, not in any way, but, well……perhaps he…no, she’d NEVER admit it, not even to herself that Spike did indeed get her hot!


Spike leaned in, tapped the side of his nose and said with a grin,


“The nose always knows, you can’t fool me – vampires get you hot.”


“A vampire – one, singular got me-“


“Yeah, save it  -  I know his repertoire – I bet he didn’t even take the time to get you properly ready for him – just wham, bam – and “


Suddenly Spike was almost seeing stars – Buffy had backhanded him.


The smile went from his face, and he grabbed her roughly and pulled her up close to him, holding her so tight she couldn’t even struggle


“Admit it – with ‘Peaches’ I bet it was missionary position, in the dark, no foreplay, and I bet he nearly squashed you to boot!”


This statement of fact had Buffy colouring up


“I knew it!”


“It was beautiful – it was-“


“Shit – and you can’t tell me otherwise – and he lived with a prostitute for over a hundred years and he learned nothing!”


Buffy was REALLY beginning to feel the cold now, and she scowled at him




“Yes love, I know, keep telling yourself that when you’re yelling my name skywards. I’ve smelt you, you know, when we fight – your arousal” he’d moved in closer now, she knew she was cold, as Spike felt the same temperature she was. He kept hold of her wrists, and began to kiss her neck……….


“Relax, just give into it – (kiss) I promise I’ll fix your car (kiss) and you can be on your (Kiss, kiss) merry way afterwards” Letting her hands go, Spike’s fingers crept up her thin top, and flipping up her bra-cups, began fondling her breast.


Her nipples already hard from the cold hardened even further to aching peaks, and Spike worked his way kiss-nibbling down her throat to reach the hardened nub and worry it with his tongue, before sucking the whole nipple and areola into his mouth. Buffy gasped sharply and her head rolled back. He was holding her tightly with one arm, but this was cramping not only his style, but his muscles too.


“Come on….no good having a comfy back seat going to waste”


“Huh, wait, no not in my car – oh…”


“Mine then? – Thought not!” he opened the rear door of her car, and motioned with his head for her to get in.


Buffy did so, sliding backwards. Spike gave a cursory glance around – there didn’t seem to be any hiding place for a stake anyway….


“Lift up….there, that’s it…” he knew to keep the talk to a minimum, she’d complied with his wishes and raised her bottom off the seat and Spike had pulled down her shorts.


He then took off her top, and she shrugged out of her bra, crossing her arms over her chest. Lying there in a tiny scrap of lace thong, Spike quickly threw off his duster, and began to unbuckle his jeans.


Buffy grabbed his coat, and pulled it over her exposed top half.


“A-a…let the dog see the rabbit, pet”


“But I’m freezing!”


“Okay, well I’ll pull it over us when I’m ready…” Suddenly Spike dropped out of sight, and Buffy raised her head, wondering what the hell was going…OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


Having ripped off the silly bit of lace, Spike smiled to himself; she was already wet – despite all her protestations to the contrary Buffy was turned on by him.


He licked wetly around her top inner thigh, before sliding his tongue the whole length of her labia. She felt his hands part her legs even more, and push her knees back towards her chest.


She felt the anticipation in her stomach – a warm, no, hot glow that radiated out from her very centre.


His mouth was on her again, his tongue lapping and swirling around, flicking his tongue at her clit Buffy’s legs stiffened and she let out a rather strangled gargle, she bit the back of her hand to stop herself crying out


Chapter 3



He teased and lapped, probed with his tongue, sending all sorts of delicious sensations through her.


Nibbling around her clit, Spike slowly slid a finger inside her – she was very wet – but oh-so-bloody tight – and hot –she was like an inferno to him! Buffy writhed and bucked, clutching at he leather upholstery digging her nails in the soft leather, letting out little groans and moans that were making Spike harder. Knowing she was about to climax, Spike moved away, and Buffy let out a frustrated wail –


It was now or never, Spike knelt up and put his huge dick at her opening, he said,


“Promise you, it’ll be the best….” Too far gone to come back with any sort of comment, withering or otherwise, Buffy felt her body being invaded by something cool, and MASSIVE.


She couldn’t help it she let out a long groan, and climaxed straight away.


“Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” Spike gritted his teeth – oh boy, he knew she was hot, knew she was tight, but the feeling was – well – TOTALLY unlike anything he’d felt before, so fantastically good – utterly delicious and he knew, he’d have to be good, after all the bragging he’d done – he felt like he could loose it straight away, boy did she feel good, well, he’d made an excellent start!


He grabbed her thighs and pulled her down to the edge of the seat, and thrust up hard, until he was fully inside her, he had to stop for a few seconds, they were both panting, instinct – it must be, as of course, Spike had no need to breath!


Buffy wasn’t only panting, she was gulping air, Spike reared over her, then dipped his head to hers and kissed her – at first she tried to resist, she could taste herself on his lips, but his cool tongue plundered her mouth, and it was such a turn on – being impaled on him – he was all around her, filling her, he moved his lips to her neck – and to be quite truthful, Buffy wouldn’t have cared less if he’d bitten her – she was heading for the mother of all orgasms – and so quickly after the first one too.


Spike couldn’t help himself – he loved to talk during sex.


“Gods – slayer – Buffy – you feel so good…so hot…so tight…sweet - ooooohhhhh”


His breathy words in her ear made her shiver with pure pleasure – she thought she was going to hate it, but my god, she’d never had sensations like this – he was right, it WAS the best, he was so big – Spike knew he was rapidly approaching the point of no return, He lowered his head and caught a nipple, suckled on it, and Buffy bucked up hard to meet his power-thrusts –


“Spike! – ooooohhhhh – ggooooddddd – aaaaahhhhh! She felt herself stretch even more as his monster dick swelled and he stopped thrusting, and just pushed up hard, he felt her slick walls contract and spasm around him, squeezing him hard as he filled her with his cool essence – quenching the inferno that raged in her.


He collapsed on top of her – boy – he’d never come so hard in his un-life! After a moment or two, Spike thought it prudent to move off her -


Buffy was heaving for breath – she felt boneless and breathless, and as he carefully withdrew from her, Buffy still lay there, legs akimbo for a few seconds, trying to get coherent thoughts together.


He grinned down at her, she looked – what? – Yeah, TOTALLY shagged out! HE’D done that to her – him, Spike – William the Bloody – reduced the slayer to boneless jelly!


He hitched up his jeans, and true to his word, he walked around to the front of her car. He pressed the lead back onto the battery, and called out,


“Okay slayer, try it now”


When she didn’t comply immediately, he looked around the hood to see Buffy clothed, and putting on his duster.


“She got into the driving seat, and turned the ignition key, the engine purred into life. Spike closed the hood and grinned.


“There you go…and yes, you can borrow my duster…but I want it back”


Buffy feeling a myriad of emotions, relief that he’d kept his word, relief that the car was fixed – regret at what she’d done, reasoning with herself that she had no other option………




“Huh – what – oh, yeah – I’ll drop it in to you when I’m next in Restfield”


“No, I was thinking, about 7 miles up the road, actually”


“What?” Buffy looked puzzled


Suddenly, in the distance, she could see headlights of something big coming along, then another set, and then another.


It took thirty seconds for three huge trucks to whistle on passed her and she gripped the steering wheel so tightly, her knuckles had gone white  - the one phrase repeated itself in her brain – she SHOULD have waited!


Spike knew what she was thinking and said,


“I know what you’re thinking slayer – but then if you HAD of waited, well, you would never have known the best sex of your life, would you!”


Buffy scowled


“You’re a pig!”


“And speaking of pig, I know you’re hungry – so I suggest we carry on for roughly seven miles, where we can stop, you can give me my duster back, and you can get yourself something to eat – I can recommend the ‘All Day Breakfast’  - it’s delicious.




“At Molly’s Truck-Stop – it’s very popular – she does a great line in blood-sausage too!” Spike couldn’t keep the smirk off his face…


Seething, Buffy screamed,


“I HATE YOU!” And floored the accelerator, and zoomed off.


Spike chuckled all the way back to his car…well, even if he never saw his beloved duster again – on balance, it had been worth it – he’d banged the slayer senseless, and he knew he’d woken something inside her that wouldn’t be satisfied by either herself or ANY mere mortal……there WOULD be a re-match – might take a couple o’ weeks to wear her down, but he’d do it – he KNEW he’d do it….when old Spikey got an idea into his head, well there was nothing that would stop him…………………………………


The End


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