Caught Between Two Lovers
Pattyanne 's Fic
Kings of Mercia
LoobyLoos' Fic
Jen's Fic

Part 36.....

When You Say Nothing At All


"It's amazing how you can speak

right to my heart

Without saying a word, you can light

up the dark..."


He rose slowly to his feet, then leaned down and picked her up. Carrying her to the bed, he deposited her in the middle as carefully as if she were made of spun glass.

She held out her arms, her body all warm and soft and beckoning to him, tempting him to fall into her and never leave. As he crawled in next to her, she drifted closer.

Her little fingers touched the sharp angle of his cheekbones, tracing them tenderly. Over the slash of his brows, then down the strong line of his jaw.

He shuddered beneath the light touch, all his nerve endings tingling the way they did every time he saw er.

Cupping his face in her hands, she drew it towards hers.


"Try as I may

I can never explain

What I hear when you

don't say a thing.."


Her lips were moist and warm beneath his, parting to allow his tongue to caress her inner cheeks and dance along the edges of her teeth.

Keeping his lower body to one side of her, he framed her upper torso between his arms, laying flat on the bed on either side of her.

She made an inarticulate sound in her throat, a kittenish little moan that sent a thrill of love and

lust rocketing through him. The knowledge that he was the only man who'd heard that particular

vocalization, excited both his pride and his passion.

Her arms were curving behind his neck as she pulled him deeper into the kiss, instinctively turning her body towards his. When she could go no longer without air, her head dropped back and she gave him the soft flesh of her throat to do what he wanted with.

His lips moved down, caressing the warm skin, touching it lightly with his tongue.

When he reached the plump curve of her breast, she gasped soundlessly, arching her back.


"The smile on your face

Lets me know that you need me

There's a truth in your eyes

Saying you'll never leave me.."


He devoted passionate attention to her breasts. The cool wash of his tongue left them damp and aching for a deeper touch. It swirled around her nipples in teasing, darting patterns, making them even harder and more sensitive.

Her fingers slipped into the silk of his hair, tightening there and holding him where she needed him. When she couldn't wait another moment, he sensed it, and opened his mouth. Taking her right breast deeply inside, he suckled at her...first softly, then harder...nipping with his teeth, soothing with his tongue.

Blindly, one of her hands moved down and guided him, grasping his jaw and leading him to her unattended breast, then back to the first.

He licked and sucked at her warm body, finding his true nourishment there. Glancing up, he saw her watching him.

Releasing her from the pull of his hungry mouth, he kept his eyes on hers as he extended his tongue and flicked it rapidly back and forth on the rose colored tips of her breasts.

She stroked and petted him, offering soft cries of pleasure as he worked over her responsive body.

When he left her breasts, he began to lick and kiss a path downwards. Over her ribcage, then her abdomen, his tongue slithered wetly on her skin.

Down further, still.....


"The touch of your hand says

you'll catch me, whenever I fall

You say it best

When you say nothing at all..."


She stared down at him, her breath coming in harsh gasps.

His hands held her legs spread wide as his tongue caressed the sensitive bud of her clit. It rubbed up and down her dewy cleft, burrowing inside and going in deep.

Slowly....sweetly....up and down it moved, lapping and licking her with abandon, drinking down all the sticky fluids she produced.

He slipped one finger up inside of her, gliding it in and out as he sucked her, watching the look on her face.

Her eyes were dreamy and unfocused, heavy lidded with desire.

Trading places, he used his fingers on her clit and inserted his tongue up inside her tight sex, forcing it in as deeply as it would go.

She clawed at the mattress, trying desperately to find some stable way to anchor herself to the earth.

Then, he licked her harder, eating her like a wild beast, gorging on her flesh...feasting...devouring.

Before she realized it was approaching, climax swept over her, making her shake and whimper, and tighten her thighs around his head.

All in all, it was a good thing he had no need for air.


"All day long I can hear

people talking out loud

But when you hold me near

You drown out the crowd.."


When she opened her eyes, he was on his knees above her. His shaft was rigidly hard and leaking semen, and he wrapped his own fingers around it, lazily fondling himself.

She raised up on her elbows, watching him avidly.

Smiling, he moved closer, the look in his eyes inviting her to touch him.

Her hand drifted towards him. With the tip of her index finger, she spread the pearly drop of ejaculate around the head of his impressive erection.

It was his turn to gasp, although the oxygen was useless.

His hips moved sinuously back and forth in a shallow thrusting rhythm. Her small wet fingers held and squeezed him, pumping up and down his length. When his hand closed over hers, it made her grasp harder at him.

He closed his eyes, concentrating all his other senses on what she was doing to his body. The feel of her hot, little hand...the sound as it jerked him hard and fast...the scent of his semen, mingling with that of her arousal...the taste of his own blood as he bit into his lower lip to keep from howling like a wild dog at a full moon...all these things were combining and coalescing in him, driving him to his ultimate goal.

Her fingers began to explore deeper, pushing down between his thighs to hold his scrotum in her palm, weighing it and feeling the heavy mass move around in her hand.

The teasing touch was rapidly becoming unbearable, and he had to force himself to pull back before things came to a premature conclusion.

He settled himself on top of her, taking her mouth in a deeply ravenous kiss as he lifted her right thigh up, anchoring it in the bend of his elbow.

The head of his shaft rubbed tantalizingly against her wet cleft, and they both groaned softly at the sensation.


"Try as they may, they can

never define

What's being said between

your heart and mine..."


She sent her hands down over his shoulders, along the curve of his spine. They caressed his smooth skin and then cupped themselves over his rear.

He moved his hips, urging her legs to part wider.

Without further foreplay, he sheathed himself inside of her, sliding in all the way until their hips clashed.

They both shivered with the delicious contact, their eyes locking on each other's.

Driving into her hard and fast, he set a pace that she had to struggle to keep up with. She felt every thrust of his rock hard penis clear through her, reaching so deeply that he touched her womb.

The muscles of his rump clenched and relaxed with his motions, and she squeezed them fondly, loving the feel of his body churning into hers.


"The smile on your face

Lets me know that you need me

There's a truth in your eyes

Saying you'll never leave me.."


Her heart hammered in her chest as he rammed in and slid back out of her. Faster and faster, until he abandoned all restraint and began pounding into her at a frenzied pace.

She raised her hips to meet every downstroke, releasing a soft grunt with each impact of their bodies coming together.

Mouths locked, and tongues tangled wetly in searing kisses.

Nails dug into flesh, leaving their mark on pale skin.

And still, he pistoned into her, relentlessly, making a hot and slick friction that drove them both wild.


"The touch of your hand says

you'll catch me whenever I fall.."


Rolling over suddenly, he lifted her on top of him without losing their connection.

Her head fell back until the ends of her hair touched the fingers he had around her waist.

As he bucked his hips up into her, she rode him like a wild pony, thrashing on top of him in a fine madness.

She braced her hands on his chest as she slid up and down the length of him, concentrating on the pleasure she was giving and taking.

His hands slid down and held her hips, guiding her in her determined quest.

A hot flush of excitement stained her skin. She closed her eyes, pushing down harder and harder. Faster...grinding herself onto him...the wetness flowing copiously out of her, sticky and warm.

She was so beautiful at that moment, it made her heart ache in his chest, made everything inside him explode out and into her, flooding her tender passage with a surging gush of milky semen.

The wild, rushing storm swept them both away.

Moments later, she collapsed in his arms.

He stroked the damp skin of her back, calming her.

She pulled up and looked into his eyes.

And they smiled.


"You say it best

When you say nothing at all..."



AN: Well, the song inspired me. I've never written a love scene without dialogue before, and I wasn't sure it would work.



Part 37....

I Only Want To Be With You


"I don't know what it is that makes

me love you so

I only know I never want to let you go.."


As quietly as she could manage, Buffy opened the outside door to Willow's bedroom.

The room was dark, it's only illumination provided by the moonlight. All Buffy could hear was a slight snore coming from the direction of Willow's bed.

She managed to locate her overnight bag, then slipped into the bathroom and changed into the over sized football jersey her father had given her.

It was difficult to maneuver without the light on, but she didn't want to take a chance on it disturbing her friend's sleep. She brushed her teeth in the pitch black dark, only allowing a trickle of water to dampen the brush. Since she didn't want running water to wake anyone up, she swallowed the mouthful of toothpaste to avoid having to rinse out the sink.

When she was finished, she brushed her hair, but didn't bother trying to remove her make up.

Opening the door an inch at a time in order to avoid the loud squeak it usually made, she tiptoed across the room and climbed into the sleeping bag that had been rolled out for her.

Only when she was finally situated did she let out a tired sigh and close her eyes, feeling quite stealthy.


So much for stealth.

"Hi, Willow."

There was a rustle of bed covers as her friend sat up and clicked on her bedside lamp.

The two girls exchanged a long measured look, each one waiting for the other to speak.

"Where have you...?"

"Sorry I woke you..." they said in unison.

"Okay, you first," Willow said.

"No, you."

Willow didn't have to be asked twice. "Where have you been?"

The last thing Buffy wanted to do right now was go into the details of her evening 'post-formal', but knowing that Willow would have covered for her if necessary made her feel obliged.

"With William," she said simply, hoping Willow would say, "Oh..all right, then" and go back to sleep.

It was a long shot, and it didn't pan out.

"Um, Buffy...I hope you don't think I'm being nosy but...when did you get married?"

**A few months ago, when my vampire lover took a nice juicy bite out of me.**

Well, THAT wouldn't go over well at all!

"Oh, that," she said, trying to sound casual and amused. "He kind of...exaggerated...a little. You know how guys are."

Before Willow could comment on that remark, Cordelia stirred on the love seat where she'd spread her blankets. "What's going on?" she asked sleepily.

"Buffy's back," Willow informed her.

Cordy made a face. "Buffy? You mean Mrs. Who-ever-the-hell-he-is? THAT Buffy?"

Perfect. Just exactly what she needed at this moment...dual twenty questions.

"I was just telling Willow that he didn't mean it the way it sounded," she explained nervously. "It was...things were kind of emotional."

The other two girls waited, clearly expecting Buffy to expound on her meaning.

"I'm just saying that...well, we're know...completely married other married people are...are married."

She was floundering, nearly ready to sink, and if William had been there she'd have smacked him upside the head and said, "Now, see what you've started!"

"So, you're not married?" Willow asked, wanting some less confusing clarification.

"Not..not legally," Buffy stammered. "We're more like...sort of...almost..."

"Holy shit!" Cordy interjected, her gaze riveted to Buffy's left hand. "Is that an engagement ring?"

She and Willow joined Buffy on the floor, whereupon Cordelia grabbed hold of Buffy's hand and examined the diamond with an appraiser's eye for quality.

"Buffy...that's beautiful," Willow exclaimed.

Cordy shook her head. "That's not ALL it is," she said. "This is a round, ideal cut, 3.00 carat diamond in a platinum setting. Internally flawless." She looked up at Buffy. "This is a fourteen thousand dollar ring."

Buffy stared at her hand in shock.

Willow's mouth dropped open. "Fourteen?" she squeaked. "Not...not four maybe?"

"Trust me," Cordelia replied. "I know these things."


"Cause you've started something

Oh, can't you see

That ever since we met, you've had a

hold on me..."


An hour later, Buffy lay sleepless on Willow's bedroom rug. The question and answer session she'd been subjected to had left her feeling restless, and vaguely unhappy.

Her body was tired...worn out from the emotional roller coaster she'd been stuck on all evening, not to mention the physical exertions...but her mind and heart gave her no peace whatsoever.

She had clung to William like a scared little girl when he'd dropped her off at Willow's, embarrassing herself when he'd had to pry her arms from around his neck. Holding her hand firmly in his, he had led her up the outside staircase and along the balcony leading to Willow's bedroom.

After kissing her goodnight several times, he had held her tightly, promising her over and over again that he wouldn't disappear from her life, that he would call her later in the day once she'd gotten some sleep.

Before he'd left, he had reached into his coat pocket and extracted a cell phone he'd acquired for her before he'd left Los Angeles. He had explained that she had completely unlimited service and could use the phone as much as she liked, not concerning herself with the details of a rate schedule.

He had then gone on to show her that he'd already programmed his own cell number into her keypad.

Pressing the little phone into her hand, he'd kissed her once last time and turned to leave.

Buffy, an aficionado of great romance in both novels and film, hadn't taken her eyes off him as he'd walked back to where his car sat idling at the curb. She could literally feel her heart hurting inside of her as he'd driven away.

He had been gone for so long...she had just now gotten him back...and now he was gone again. And even the knowledge that he had only gone as far as the hotel offered no consolation.

Her thumb rubbed absently over the diamond in her engagement ring. She had nearly wet her pants when Cordelia had announced the probable cost of the gem.

Buffy had known, of course, that the diamond was real. She just hadn't expected to hear how expensive it must have been. The only good jewelry she'd ever owned up until this point had been the birthstone ring her parents had given her when she'd graduated from middle school, and the opal earrings her grandmother had bequeathed to her in her will.

Although she hated the idea of taking the ring off, even for an instant, she was going to have hide it from her mother; who would have an absolute fit if she discovered that her daughter had accepted such an expensive piece of jewelry from a man she herself didn't even know.

Buffy rolled over to lay on her stomach, her hands shoved up under the pillow.

She missed William so badly that she wasn't sure how she was going to live through it. When he'd first been gone, the missing had been sharply painful, like a piece of glass slicing into her tender flesh. After a while, it had turned from that into a dull, throbbing ache that was never completely absent, though she'd been able to cover it up most of the time.

But now, knowing that he was so close, the ache was becoming unbearable.

And if it was this bad much worse would it be as the days rolled by? They'd had so much freedom to be together when her mother had been out of town. He could come to her house then and stay for most of the night. It had been almost like she'd imagined marriage would be; two people going about their separate days, then coming home to be together all evening and night.

They wouldn't have that luxury anymore. Their time together would have to be carefully planned and would be limited to what she could reasonably expect to get away with. There would certainly be no overnight visits, unless she could convince her mother that she was spending an awful lot of time with Willow. That meant that she'd have to pull her friend into the deception long with her, and it wasn't something that Willow would be proficient at. Keeping secrets and being sneaky just wasn't her best event.

Besides, it wasn't fair of her to expect it of Willow. And she hated the idea of constantly lying to the mother that was so good to her.

God....what were they going to do?


"It happens to be true

I only want to be with you.."


Her fingers brushed against the cell phone she had pushed under her pillow. Drawing it out, she held it in the cupped palm of her hand.

Her eyes were drawn to the keypad.

She had to talk to him. Just hear his voice. If she could do that, then she'd be able to get some sleep...she just knew it.

Sliding out of her sleeping bag, she crept across the room and went out onto the balcony.

He wouldn't be asleep. Probably not, anyway. Even though it was nearly 4:00 in the morning.

And even if he was, he wouldn't be mad at her for calling. He never got mad at her. No matter what stupid thing she did, William was always tolerant of it, always accepting and usually amused.

She keyed the number and listened to the sounds of her call going through.

It rang twice before it was answered.

"Why aren't you sleeping, sweetheart?"

Buffy smiled, leaning against the balustrade.

"I don't know," she said. "I just can't seem to fall asleep."

William chuckled softly. "Neither can I. I miss you, love."

All of Buffy's pent up emotions began to gush out in a torrent of words. "Oh, William...I miss you, too. It's worse than ever...even though you're back...just a few miles away. It's hard to have you so close and not...not be with you. I NEED to be with you. I'm...I'm so afraid that..."

"Afraid of what, love?" he asked, concern audible in his voice.

"I don't know!" she wailed. "That's the problem. I'm afraid of something that...that I can't identify."

"Buffy...listen to me..."

"What if I wake up and it's all a dream?" she went on, not even hearing his words. "I had that dream, you know...while you were gone. A bunch of times. And..and every time I woke weren't there."

"Baby...I AM here now. I promise you...I'm not going anywhere. Just...just look at your ring. Are you wearing it?"

"Uh-huh," she sniffled. "But what were you thinking, buying something so expensive?"

"I...what?" Her sudden segue made him laugh. "Are you telling me you DON'T want me plying you with expensive jewels?"

"Well, not exactly," she said. "That would just be stupid."

"Listen, love," he said quietly, "I intend to drape you with diamonds on a regular basis, or any other gem that you you'd best get used to it. Now...look at your ring....are you doing it?"

"Yes," Buffy replied, staring at her hand with tear filled eyes. "It''s so beautiful," she added, taking in and releasing a ragged breath.

"Well, that's my promise to be here," William said. "I'll be beside you forever, love. It's just you and me now. And nobody is ever going to come between us."


"It doesn't matter where you go

or what you do

I want to spend each moment of the

day with you.."


Buffy nodded, forgetting for a moment that he couldn't see her.

"Buffy? to me."

"I know," she said quickly, the tears beginning to spill down her cheeks. "I really do. It's just...just..."

He was quiet for a moment, then said, "Buffy...honey, are you crying?"

She swallowed hard, wiping her face on the back of her hand, feeling like a great big baby. "Maybe..." she began, her voice wobbly, "maybe a little. I'm sorry."

There was a moment of utter quiet between them before he spoke.

"I'm on my way."


"Look what has happened

With just one kiss

I never knew that I could be in

love like this

It's crazy, but it's true

I only want to be with you..."





Part thirty-eight.....






"Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking..."




He ran every red light and stop sign between the hotel and Willow's house.


When Buffy had called, William had been on the verge of calling her. Only the discipline he'd forced himself to acquire when he'd first realized that he was going to have to change his ways if he wanted to stay a part of the slayer's life kept him from picking up the phone.


Lying in a bed he'd only ever shared with her, felt more like lying on a bed of nails. The mattress was plush and comfortable, and the bed linens were soft and warm, and scented of her...but he needed her beside him to feel truly at peace.  As he'd stared up at the dark ceiling, he'd made a decision regarding his future living arrangements; as soon as it was possible to accomplish, he was going to have to find a house for them to eventually live in together. This hotel was simply too full of distracting memories for him to remain there alone.


Tossing and thrashing about in an effort to find a comfortable sleeping position, he hadn't been able to focus his waking thoughts on anything but Buffy. Even after their mutually pleasurable reunion...all four encounters...he was still starved for her; for the taste of her lips and the warmth of her arms, for her tender touch and the bite of her nails, for her girlish laughter and her passionate cries.


When he'd heard the soft burring of his cell phone, he knew instantly that it was her, and that she was feeling the same yearnings he was experiencing.


What he hadn't take into account was the intensity with which she was feeling them.


He really should have known.  Buffy was very young and not experienced in hiding her feelings. When she was happy, she smiled and laughed. When she was angry, she stamped her foot and her eyes flashed with fire. When she was sad, she one knew that better than he did.


After leaving her at her friend's house, he had tormented himself all the way back to the hotel with the image of her sweet face and her frightened eyes...the way she had clung to him, begging him without words not to leave her there.


It had been difficult, but he'd had no real choice in the matter.  If she hadn't shown up at a fairly reasonable hour, her friends would have sent up an alarm. Her mother would have been called, and no doubt the police department would have become involved at that point, since the woman had no way of knowing that her daughter was more than capable of taking care of herself.


It would be difficult enough to gain her mother's acceptance of him as a suitor for her sixteen year old daughter. He had no illusions of being welcomed with open arms by a prospective mother-in-law.  Joyce Summers would see him as a grown man, far too old to be pursuing a teenage girl in her third year of high school.


He couldn't take a chance on alienating her, at this early stage of the game, by keeping Buffy out all night when she'd been instructed to go home with her friend.


Still, it had almost broken his heart when he'd had to forcibly pull Buffy's arms from around his neck and make her go inside.  He didn't want her any farther away than the reach of his hand, and he'd felt as though he was deserting her all over again.


Kissing her one last time, he had turned and walked purposefully back to his car, not daring to look back and lose all of his hard won resolve.




"When there are clouds in the sky

You'll get by..."



She had sounded quite brave at first. Her voice had been bright and slightly amused at her own weakness. After sharing a mutual confession of inability to sleep though, it had changed in tone.


When she had finally admitted that she was afraid to be apart from him, afraid that their reunion would turn out to be a figment of her imagination or a shattered dream, he'd felt the first touch of his own fears returning.  He'd been determined to conquer those fears, both his and hers, by assuring her that he was back now, and that nothing was going to separate them.


For a moment, he'd thought he'd been successful. When he'd told her to look at her ring whenever she was feeling sad or uncertain, and she'd responded by taking him to task about the expense, he'd laughed and teased her.


But the light moment hadn't lasted long. He'd heard the amusement disappear from her voice, and he'd braced himself for what he feared was coming next.


Then...she had begun to cry. Not loudly or plaintively, but he sure as if he'd been standing there with her...that it was happening.


And he couldn't bear it.


He'd already been the cause of more unhappiness than she deserved to have thrust upon her, and he had sworn to himself that...when he had her back...she would never have reason to cry because of him again.


So, his course had been clear. She needed him, needed him badly enough to cry for him...and he had to go to her.


It was as simple as that.




"If you smile through your fear

and sorrow

Smile, and maybe tomorrow..."




William pulled up to the curb and slammed the car into 'Park'. 


Buffy was sitting on the little balcony that ran alongside her friend's house, dangling her legs over the side. With her fingers wrapped around the railing, she peeked through two of the slats, watching him as he crossed the large expanse of lawn.


He couldn't being amused by what he saw. She'd obviously tried to repair her tear streaked face without going back inside, and had used the sleeve of her nightshirt to do it with.  There was a streak of black mascara smeared on the maroon cotton, and her eyes looked smudged.


The sight touched his heart, and he smiled at her.


"Well, well...if it isn't Juliet," he said. "You've strayed awfully far from Verona, my lady. Are you expecting some one?"


Buffy sniffled and gave him a watery eyed smile. "Well, I was waiting for Romeo...but I guess you'll do."


She sounded cheerful enough, but in the next moment she jumped to her feet and pelted down the stairs.


William met her at the bottom of the staircase, wrapping her in a tight embrace as she catapulted into his arms.


"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice muffled against his throat.


He just shook his head. "Oh, don't be, angelface," he said firmly. "Don't you ever apologize for needing me."  He tightened his arms around her, nuzzling her soft hair. "It's the sweetest thing I've ever known."


Buffy clung to him even more. "But I made you come all the way back here."


" just gave me an excuse," he told her.


A few moments went by before she released her iron clad grip on him and moved back a little, looking up into his eyes. She looked as though she had a lot to day, as if she'd been rehearsing a lengthy speech of explanation for her needy behavior.


"I...I just missed you," she said haltingly. "It was awful. It actually hurt...right here."  She placed one hand over her heart.


He nodded in complete understanding. "For me, too," he said, stroking her hair tenderly.


Buffy placed her hands on his cheeks, drawing him down into her kiss.  Her chaotic emotions seemed to be guiding her, making her a little more aggressive than she normally was.  Her  tongue crept from her mouth and slipped past his lips, searching for his.


"Buffy," he murmured, when she pulled away to draw breath. Needing to maintain contact, he kissed and nuzzled the side of her face and down her throat.


When he located his mark on her skin, he licked it gently, making her inhale sharply and shiver a little.


He pulled back, looking at her with concern. "Are you cold?" he asked, rubbing his hands up and down her arms.


"Cold?" she echoed. Afraid he might order her back into the house, she denied it. The grass felt unpleasantly damp and chilly, and she shifted from one foot to the other. "What makes you think THAT?"


William glanced down at her moving feet. "Because either you're cold, or you need to go to the bathroom very badly," he observed.


Two crimson flags appeared in her cheeks, but she giggled at his remark.


"That's much better," he said, smiling back at her.



You'll see the sun come shining

through, if you...."




"Okay," she admitted. "I'm a little cold...but please don't make me go in the..."


Her voice trailed off as he shrugged his coat off and bundled her up in it, guiding her arms into the sleeves. He looked her up and down, delighted with the picture she made standing there in a garment that was far too large for her petite frame.


Shaking the sleeves down to free her hands, Buffy's ring caught on the inner lining and ripped it.


She froze in place, staring up at him, her eyes growing wider and wider. "Oh, no. I'm sor..."


Watching the changing expressions on her face, he knew what was coming and he decided to head it off.


"Don't," he said, pointing one finger at her to emphasize the word.


"Yeah, but I tore the..."


"Ah-ah."  He shook his head seriously.




"I mean it, Buffy."


She subsided, and he watched her, counting it down in his head. **Five..four..three..two..**


"I'll pay for the..." she burst out, inevitably.


Grabbing her around the waist, he lifted her off her feet. "Fine," he said, laughing and squeezing  her until an 'oomph' came  from her abdomen. "I'll bill you."



"Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness..."



Buffy smiled widely when she got her air back, ready to try and join in his fun. "Will you take a check?" she asked.


"Depends," he replied. "You got any I.D.?"


She shook her head, no.


"Then you're out of luck. Pay up."


"Actually," she amended, "Xander got me a fake one once from this guy he knows who makes them, but it said I was forty-two so I figured I'd better not try and use it."


William didn't even want to imagine what kind of lame-brained idea that stupid boy may have been cooking up that required identification.


Shaking off his irritation, he kissed Buffy again, projecting into it every bit of love and desire, and the unending need for her glowing presence in his life...and in his heart.


She returned it all to him in full measure, holding nothing of herself back, surrendering willingly to him.


But try as she might, she couldn't dismiss a feeling of impending sadness when she remembered that the sun would be rising soon.


He would have to leave...and she would have to stay, and that knowledge made her throat ache with tears she was determined not to give in to.


Holding him to her, she saw the same emotions in his eyes.



"Although a tear may be ever so


That's the time you must keep on trying.."





Buffy nodded, a jerky movement of her head. "I know," she said, swallowing that ache that was

strangling her and straightening her spine when he set her on her feet.


 She wasn't-wasn't-WAS NOT going to make this harder on him by acting like a child. Smoothing the wrinkles that her fingers had made in his shirt, she took a deep breath. "I'm okay, now...and you have to go."


He knew her far too well to accept THIS at face value. Cupping her face in his hands, he tilted it up and made her look at him.


The tenderness in his eyes totally decimated her "I'm just fine, thanks" facade.


Tears shimmered, blinding her for a moment as she tried to blink them away.



"Smile...what's the use in crying?"




Misery swamped her, taking her down before she knew what was coming.


Pressing her cheek against his chest, she shut her eyes tight.


"Oh, God," she whispered. "William...what are we going to do?"


Keeping her close, he kissed the soft crown of her hair....and told her.


"We're going to get married."



"You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you'll just smile..."









Part thirty-nine.....

I Want To Spend My Lifetime Loving You

"Moon so bright, night so fine
Keep your heart here with mine
Life's a dream we are dreaming.."

"Go inside and get your things," William said, giving Buffy a slight nudge. "We'll leave right now.
Driving straight through to Mexico, we can be there by early evening."

Buffy smiled hugely and turned to run up the staircase, his coat dragging on the steps behind
her. Halfway up, she stopped and turned around, looking down at him with a dismayed expression.

"Problem?" he asked.

"Well," she said fretfully. "Maybe a small one. I don't think my mother will let me get married just yet."

He gave her a shrug and a shake of his head. "I'm sure she won't. That's why we can't stop and ask her permission." He came up the steps after her. "Buffy, you can't tell your mother about this until it's over."

Staring at him with wide eyes, Buffy wrung her hands together. Another secret to be kept from her mother. Another lie to add to all the ones she'd already told her...both necessary and not.

But, there was a larger problem than that particular one. Her mom had been planning imaginary weddings for her almost from the day of her birth.

Joyce and Hank Summers had married young, just barely out of school. Parental disapproval had forced them to sacrifice any hope of a huge, splashy wedding. Instead, they had eloped to Las Vegas, and their marriage ceremony had been performed in a faux wedding chapel on the strip, right next door to Circus-Circus.

Everything had been fake. The flowers provided were plastic and in serious need of dusting. The music was canned and tinny, emerging from a cassette player that kept sticking. They'd purchased their rings in a pawn shop, cheap gold bands that had been left there by some unlucky gambler in need of funds and never reclaimed.

Even though the couple had gone on to lead a happy life together for several years, Joyce had never really forgotten the seedy chapel that had carried a slight smell of vomit and Lysol, an aroma left over from the extremely nervous and very drunk couple who'd exchanged vows before them.

Her parents had always planned to renew their vows, to do it properly when they could afford it, but the marriage fell apart and the dream died with it.

Joyce had told Buffy this sorry tale more than once over the years, promising her that when the day came for HER to marry, the wedding would be everything she herself had always wanted, but never achieved.

"Race the moon, catch the wind
Ride the night to the end
Seize the day, stand up for the light.."

Now, history was repeating itself.

Logically, Buffy knew that her wedding would be a far cry from what her mother had experienced. William would see to it, and would probably spend a small fortune to make it so.

The ring on her hand was proof of that.

He would find some exotically beautiful location, would outfit her in a gown meant for royalty, and would buy every flower in the country of Mexico, never counting the cost.

But the cost would be exceedingly dear, all the same. Emotionally as well as financially.

Buffy didn't even want to imagine the look on her mother's face if she were to suddenly drop
out of sight, then reappear with a husband in tow.

William's voice jolted her out of her gloomy train of thought.

"Darling...we have to leave now. The sun will be up soon," he said, urging her up the stairs.

She had never felt so completely pulled in opposite directions.

On the one hand, there was nothing she wanted more in the world than to be properly married to her lover. Just the thought of being Mrs. William Hamilton was enough to make shivers of pure happiness chase through her.

Then there was the other hand. The one that was waving a frantic S.O.S., telling her that setting this plan in motion would have repercussions that she'd never dreamed of and was not prepared for.

The question was, which hand should she listen to?

It was an agonizing decision, one which would bring her to tears any moment now, she just knew it.

**This is SO not fair! Why does being an adult about things have to be so hard?**

Not knowing which way to turn, she began unconsciously throwing up road blocks.

"I'm not exactly sure how this will work," she said, gazing at him appealingly. "I don't think you'll be able to pass a blood test."

William smiled at her. "That's why we're going to Mexico. We won't need them."

"Oh. Okay, that's...good." She climbed another step, then stopped and turned back around. "Will it be legal?"

He nodded. "Mostly."

"But not totally?"

"Well, sweetheart...I AM a vampire. I'm not up on all the necessary criteria for getting married, but I'm fairly certain that both parties have to be alive."

"I suppose that's best." Another step...and another halt. "A license! What about a license?"

"We'll have one," he assured her.

"Yeah, but..."

"False papers." He supplied the answer before she could finish the question.

Buffy was surprised. "You have those?"

"Mm-hmm," he replied. "I update them every few years. They aren't hard to get, if you know the right people."

"Really?" She swallowed hard. "Which papers do you have?"

William leaned against the railing. "Birth certificate. Passport. Medical records. Whatever I need to conduct business in your world."

"Business?" Buffy asked. "You have a business? What kind of a business?"

"Financial business, for the most part," he explained. "I have a lot of money. I can't carry it around with me, or stuff it in a mattress. Now," He looked at her speculatively. "Tell me why you're stalling."

"I want to spend my lifetime loving you
If that is all in life I ever do.."

"Stalling?" she asked, sounding as though she couldn't believe her ears. "Who's stalling? You think I'M stalling? I'm not...really. I'm just...I'm..." She ran out of steam and had to fess up. "I guess I'm stalling."

William sat down on the step, taking her hand and pulling her down beside him. "Buffy," he said earnestly, kissing her fingers. "I love you very much. I always will. As far as I'm concerned, you're already my wife."

He smoothed her hair back from her face. "I know it's hard to wait. But we're going to have a long life together, baby. I swear I'll make it happen, whatever it takes."

Buffy scooted closer, then climbed into his lap without waiting to be asked. His arms wrapped
snugly around her, and he nuzzled her hair.

"I'm not going anywhere," he went on. "And when you're a bit older, we'll talk to your mother and make sure she knows that I'll take very good care of you."

"Heroes rise, heroes fall
Rise again, win it all
In your heart, can't you feel the glory?"

The relief on her face was almost comical, and he had to struggle to keep from laughing.

William had never had any intention of whisking Buffy out of the country for some quickie marriage on the other side of the border. When the time came for them to be married in the eyes of society, he was going to make sure that his bright eyed princess had a dream wedding, the sort of extravagant gala befitting her beauty.

But, he'd had to make her understand that such things were worth waiting for, and that they would have all the time in the world together before they made a final commitment.

Being older and far more experienced, he knew that once she felt secure in his re-appearance in her life, her fearful anxiety would begin to taper off.

Then, in another year perhaps, when she was seventeen, they would be married.

There was nothing in the world that would stop it from happening.

"Through our joy, through our pain
We can move worlds again
Take my hand
Dance with me...."


"What, baby?"

"Were we really going to Mexico tonight?"

He smiled against her soft hair. "If that had been what you truly wanted, we'd be on our way now."

Buffy sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. "I want to marry you. I want us to be together all the time...but I want my mother to be there when it happens."

"I know you do." William eased her off his lap and tugged her to her feet. " go inside and get some sleep. I'll call you this afternoon and we'll make plans for tonight."

Buffy handed him his coat. "Tonight?"

He nodded and cupped her chin in his hand. "I think it's time you introduced me properly to your mother, don't you?"

She looked worried and relieved at the same time.

"Yes. I've told her a lot about you, but...I'm just afraid that she'll think you're too old for me."

William had been concerned about that as well. He'd given the problem sincere consideration and had only been able to come up with one possible way of dealing with it.

"Buffy," he said hesitantly, pulling his coat on. "I think maybe it's time to tell your mother everything."

Her head jerked up, and she stared at him with her mouth slightly open. "Everything?" she said, her voice squeaking with alarm. "You mean...everything?"

He knew what she was thinking, and he quickly spoke to calm her. "No. Not everything about us, love. I'm certain she's not ready for that," he said, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. "I meant that it's time to tell her that you're not an ordinary sixteen year old girl."

Agitated, she ran one hand through her hair. "Actually, it might be easier to tell her everything about us," she said doubtfully.

"Baby, you can't keep it from her forever. I think that if she knows how special you are, she might not be as worried about...other things."

Buffy sighed heavily. He was right, as he always was. The only way she would be able to be with him required total honesty on her part. She would have to sit her mom down and....

"Will you be there with me?" she asked, hanging on to his arm. "When I tell her? Please?"

He pulled her into his arms. "Of course I will. You think I'd let you go through that alone?"

Buffy burrowed her own arms beneath his coat, wrapping them snugly around his waist, and pressing her cheek against his chest. "Thank you," she whispered.

William smiled and tilted her face up to kiss her.

"You're welcome."

"I want to spend my lifetime loving you
If that is all in life I ever do
I will want nothing else to see me through
If I can spend my lifetime loving you..."

More please...